The Importance of the Clitoris
On the first day of my Human Sexuality class, I give my third and fourth year university students a quiz about some sexual basics. One purpose of this quiz is to for them to realize how little they know about sex, even in our sex-saturated world.
The quiz includes questions about ovulation, sexual orientation, sexually transmitted infections, and sexual desire. But my favourite question is about the size of the clitoris. In a class of 75 people, usually only about 5 get it right. Here’s the question:
Taking into account the entire structure, how long is the average clitoris?
a. 1 cm
b. 1 inch
c. 4 inches
d. 10 inches
e. Unsure
What is your guess? Most people answer this question based on the amount of the clitoris that is visible on the outside of the body, so they get it wrong. There is so much more to the clitoris!
The parts visible on the outside of the body are the glans clitoris, or head of the clitoris, the hood, and possibly a bit of the clitoral body/shaft. Inside there is the rest of the clitoral body, and long legs called crura that extend deep inside. The actual estimates for the length of the clitoris are 3-4 inches. Of course it is larger when engorged from arousal.
You can see the clitoris in its full glory in the image below.
Public Domain Image of the Clitoris from Wikimedia
The Importance of Stimulating the Clitoris
When a person with a clitoris is aroused, the whole structure fills with blood and increases sensitivity. Most people with clitorises need direct clitorial stimulation to reach orgasm.
The most direct ways to stimulate the external parts of the clitoris are with toys, hands and tongues. Rubbing the vulva on assorted body parts or inanimate objects also works. There is a reason many people grow up humping pillows to masturbate!
You might have noticed that I didn’t mention penis-vagina intercourse in the above list. That’s because for many, it is a relatively inefficient way to stimulate the clitoris. For some people, and in some positions, there will be direct stimulation to the clitoris that leads to orgasm.
Penis-vagina intercourse is not the best way to have an orgasm for most people with clitorises. And yet, it is what we are shown again and again in mainstream media and in porn showing heterosexual sex. Sexual pleasure is framed around what works best for stimulating penises.
Get a Vibrator
I highly, highly, highly recommend getting a vibrator to stimulate the clitoris. They come in all shapes, sizes and intensities. I also recommend getting one from a feminist sex toy shop like Good for Her, Babeland, or Venus Envy. All of those shops offer discreet online shipping.
Make sure anything you put on or in you or your partner’s genitals is body safe! Any good store will be able to answer questions about safety and toxicity of vibrators.
Vibrators can be used alone or with a partner.
I joke with one of my former students that my not-so-subtle endorsements for the (formerly Hitachi) Magic Wand vibrator in my classes (it’s ranked #1 on so many sites!) has led many a student to join the Magic Wand cult...er, club! I am a big fan, but the Magic Wand is very powerful. For people with a highly sensitive clitoris, something less intense might work better.
Knowledge is Power
Understanding what the clitoris is and how it works is key to enhancing sexual pleasure for people with clitorises. I encourage you to experiment with what works for you or your partner. What feels best and when to hit the clit will vary depending on the person. There is no one way to pleasure a clitoris, but lots of time to play and explore!